Ask Anything 2e with the Experts

Thursday, December 12, 2019 @ 10:00am Pacific Time

Join our world-renowned experts to ask anything about your 2e child, in terms of their social, emotional, academic or behavioral development.  Dr. Dan Peters is the executive director and clinical neuropsychologist at the Summit Center.  Dr. Susan Baum is the director of the 2e Center at Bridges Academy and 2e educational expert.

Click the triangles below to automagically find each specific question in the recording:

1I'm considering homeschooling my 9 year old due to a history of school trauma and his school not being the right fit. However, he has stealth dyslexia and severe dysgraphia, and I am terrified to homeschool because I don't know if I'd be able to remediate these disabilities when it is SO aversive to him. Orton Gillingham is problematic because it’s mastery-based, and my son finds it boring and embarrassing; it's also very hard to get him to write anything, even in his areas of high interest. Any advice?
2What do you do when your spouse is not on board with any of the testing. He says she’s just being obstinate! He constantly criticizes her and says she’s lazy….My daughter is 15, she as identified Gifted in 3rd grade and has been an accelerated program ever since…she’s still a straight A Student (but struggling) she’s in AP and Honors courses and on the Advanced Dance Team, she is extremely gifted, but so difficult at home!

Does the field of developmental psychology and/or educational psychology discuss the impact of children seeing their inner experience (emotional, sensory, cognitive) reflected among their caregivers/teachers and other people around them? How kids learn the meaning of these signals in community? And the impact when a child’s community doesn’t reflect their inner experience; doesn’t validate their experience and help them to make meaning of it? I’d love to learn more about this and how it affects the development of self, and the development of trust and the meaning one attaches to the signals arising in the body. I’d love to learn how to support recovery when a child has learned to consistently deny and suppress their internal signals and devalue their thoughts and feelings because teachers and peers do not share or understand their intense experiences; how to encourage them to attend to those signals, to trust them, and to be responsive.
Our 8 year old son is autistic (mostly presents as social difficulties and social anxiety). It seems like his problems are situational - mostly at school! He does great with friendships one on one. We take him to individual counseling once a week, and she is very pleased with his progress in their work with cognitive distortions (ex: mind reading, fortune telling, etc.). He has been doing so well that I told my husband I might stop considering changing his school next year (he is in a public charter). I got an email from his speech-language pathologist who sees him once a week for "social skills" that he is reluctant and does not want to participate. And here we see he is doing so well outside of school! I requested an IEP meeting (also after finding out that she is pulling him to a special education setting for this and his IEP lists general education setting - EEK!). How do I help the school help my son when I really believe the environment is just not a good fit? Suggest they get trained in Garcia Winner?

5My husband has recently realized that he is having a really difficult time with grief surrounding our sons many struggles (ASD, ADHD, Anxiety, SPD). He is wanting some help to process this grief so that he can move forward to acceptance and supporting our son and seeing his strengths. Are there therapists/books/resources that you can recommend for us?
6We have an 8 year old son with ADHD combined type and sensory challenges. He is extremely quick to anger, including hitting, kicking, etc., particularly at home. We do twice monthly family therapy, acupuncture, chiropractic, etc., and started working with a psychiatrist because the behaviors were getting worrisome and physical with us at home. After trying five different ADHD meds, that didn’t work, we tried Abilify which made a huge difference for three months. The efficacy has now leveled off somewhat and a psychiatrist thinks there may be a mood disorder and has referred us for additional psychological testing. What specifically should we ask the new psychologist for as more testing is done? What else if anything should we be doing to support him?
7How can we work with our school to rekindle our child's interest in something they have strengths in and been interested in the past, but school has ruined it for them? In our case it's math which currently causes panic attacks and school avoidance (he goes to school for other topics).
My 4th grade son walks home from school daily. It’s about 1 mile through neighborhood. I’ve seen him on the walk before standing still and staring at things such as standing and staring at someone’s house decorations for a very long time. Recently he told me someone pulled over and asked if he was lost. I wondered why aloud and he said well maybe because I was looking at a tree. I think it’s cool that he can observe so intently, but obviously others ‘in the wild’ see him and are concerned. Do I tell him not to do it because people won’t think it’s typical? More generally, how do we teach our kids to navigate things like this when we are not around?
9What are some things we can do when our child is feeding the physical pain of anxiety? We’ve explained about the blood flow leaving his stomach and going to his limbs to help him survive by running away. That’s why his stomach hurts. We also practice slow deep breathing daily telling him he can use this to tell his body that he’s in no danger.
10We are still in the “figuring it out” process for our 6 year old boy. There has been a lot of discussion about Processing Disorder, ADHD, Adjustment disorder, and Sensory issues. Our first IEP is on Monday the 16th, School Assesment just concluded, play therapy is ongoing, and our Neuro Psych Evaluation begins AFTER the IEP on the 20th. What can WE do to support him and his teacher?

11My son hasn’t been successful in 8th, not completing written work in all subjects. We went through the IEP process and they determined psychological services and 1 period of resource, then after new year 5 days of resource. He has accommodations too, but none of them pop out as 2E accommodations. Is there a list or resource somewhere that would give us a better understanding of what accommodations work for a 2E kid?
12My son (8) has a very strong will, and it is so difficult to get him to do anything that he did not think of himself, let alone anything new. It affects practically every aspect of his life, from getting up in the morning, to eating when his blood sugar (and mood) is low, to following instructions in school, etc. What is that about, and how do I work around it? I have finally found someone (in the public Norwegian system) who can do a neuropsych on my 8-year-old. But they say that they cannot do it if he is not cooperating, which they base on our first visit, where he was in opposition to being there. I said they have to build trust with someone that young, but they say they do not have time to schedule play sessions in addition to the actual assessment. What do I do to either motivate my reluctant son and/or convince them to change their approach?
I have a 17 year old 2e, autistic, son with dysgraphia who is taking concurrent enrollment classes at the local junior college. We met with the disabilities counselor about accommodations yesterday. They said they could not give my son course modifications, only accommodations. So for instance, if a presentation is required and the teacher grades on volume, eye contact and emphasis that they can't request that he not be graded on those items even if that is a part of his autism. Also, they will not give modification for grading on grammar, spelling, and punctuation when all these are very poor because of his dysgraphia. The only thing they will allow are voice to text and extended time. How do I get accommodation/modification for these things?
14My 15 year old is getting better about self-advocacy with school, but gets angry when I ask simple questions...for example, I received a note my kid didn't attend a meeting about making sure next semester's classes are the way they want them...kind of important. There was another issue w/a particular class where there was a workload issue where I had to get involved behind the scenes so I didn't get him upset w/me. When I ask questions I get eye rolls and the "back off" message. I think this is age appropriate to think parents are annoying and want to be independent, but if this stuff isn't done, things could go wrong w/classes, IEP management, etc. Any tips on figuring out the balance w/my kiddo peacefully?
My 12 year old daughter goes to a 3 day/week school. In the past she seems to have managed 5 days okay. I try to have her do some work on the other 2 days to varying degrees of success. Wondering if I should just allow her to have down time on the other 2 days. Her favorite activity is playing Roblox/Minecraft & resists most external classes. She’s even started to become resistant to going to the library & grocery store. Trying to find the right balance.

16I got an email from our school psychologist. She wrote, "he continues to opt out of things that he doesn’t find interesting and I know he still needs to continue to work on being more respectful towards his teacher and his classmates. He is still choosing to make “snide remarks” when he sees an opportunity. If you could check in with him about both of these issues, it would be great. It’s helpful to hear it from both school and home”. I'd love your help navigating this. THANKS!
17What's the best way to respond to teachers when they email you to say your child is being disruptive in class and disregarding classroom instructions? They met with him last week and she emailed to say they haven't seen improvement and they will be giving him lunchtime detention the next time this happens. I want to tell them that it's unreasonable to expect him to change so quickly and that detention isn't going to be useful, but don't want to be adversarial.
18I feel we missed the sensory issue piece with our 17 year old, he gets uncomfortable with sensory stuff quickly, like textures. He likes weighted blankets and often asks his dad to sit on his feet at night and morning. He has always been a talented athlete, rock climber so it does not impinge on coordination. Wonder what to do now to help to help him with all the sensory issues. OT at this point.
19What to do if people do not live close by an OT?
When I try to “Ross Greene” with my son, it’s bumpy. I recently noticed that in general, he has a hard time with direct questions- I think it’s a combo of processing and direct questions making him anxious. Even “Do you want your coat?” can be tough. So, I’ve recently been sharing my hypothesis about what’s going on and what we could do instead of asking open ended questions. He loves to tell me I’m wrong, so I don’t feel like I’m leading the witness. I’m wondering what you think about that. Does that sound like, “go with it if it works,” or am I cutting corners in some way that long term allows for less growth?
Can a kid who has modifications and doesn’t need to produce the same as other kids, get a 4.0, and feel like their 4.0 is equal to other kids’ 4.0? How does it work when applying to different schools?
22Hi, We are currently reading “From Worrier to Warrior” together with our 12-year-old. He really likes it! We think he finds great comfort in reading about things he has felt for a long time - knowing that there are names for these kinds of things. We can definitely see a change in him. Since we started reading the book, we are seeing a positive change, but at the same time it seems like his level of anxiety is getting higher, more intense. Is that to be expected? Is this part of the journey?
23When there are executive function deficits that cause my 9-year-old ASD girl anxiety at school, and cause more executive function problems as she freezes and is unable to visualize what to do next, should teachers work on decreasing anxiety to improve EF, or more on the EF, which will then indirectly decrease anxiety? We struggle with task persistence, organization, planning and problem-solving. They all cause, and are at the same time a consequence of anxiety. Thank you.
24My child had a psycho education evaluation four years ago resulting in a prescription for vyvanse and a 504 for ADHD, Dyslexia and migraines. Vyvanse causes drastic weight loss and increase anxiety. We saw two psychiatrists with differing Autism diagnosis. Kiddo is transferred to middle school in a few months. What are our next steps? Do we seek a neuropsychological evaluation, psychiatrist, a developmental pediatrician or something else. My main concerns are possible misdiagnosis, need for prescription management, effects of the wrong medication and inappropriate accommodations on the 504.

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